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ARROZ Y HABICHUELAS (RICE AND BEANS)

We bring our problems with us wherever we go, no matter how far we run.

I learned this when I went to college. I knew coming to the Dominican Republic would be a breath of fresh air, but I never knew it would be this fresh (especially in this humidity). It's so easy to get stuck in old habits and behaviors, get stuck in our comfort zones and go along with the flow of the way things are. It's easy to stay the same. The difficult part is the change. Leaving my old everyday life, all by myself, I was able to take a step back and see things from a new perspective. I've been able to re-establish my views and my values, reevaluate my behaviors and reflect on who it is that I want to be and why I haven't been her for a long time. Surprisingly, it hasn't quite as much been the act of going abroad to the Dominican Republic that has helped me, but more so, it's been the people who I have met and had the opportunity to learn from.

A little boy named Carlos has been my rock since I've arrived here. He's 4. Always filled with energy, happiness and an innocence I long for. Carlucho, without even knowing has been there to make me feel better on my worst days. I have recently felt what it really means for happiness to come from within instead of relying on others to make me happy. Incredibly, this little boy helped me realize it. I've never been able to pin point why it is I love kids so much (other than them being so cute of course), but Carlucho in particular is so filled with life. He reminds me not to sweat the small stuff, but to be present and find joy in everything I do. He is also filled with so much love. Just after I arrived, he quickly began greeting me with endless hugs and excitement by yelling "RREBECAAAAA" every time I returned home. There is not a hateful or judgmental bone in his body and I hope he grows up to be just the same. As crazy as it sounds, I strive to be more like my 4 year old host nephew.

I have also been taking a class here on Personal Leadership with the most amazing people I could ask for. Personal Leadership is defined as: 'Leadership of the self. The ability to define a direction for your life, and to move in that direction with consistency and clarity. It is to lead from the inside out. This class could not have come at a more relevant time in my life. For years I've been stuck at a stand still in a process of self discovery. The people in this class have taught me what it means to really listen and be supportive, that none of us are in this alone. We all go through the same fears, pain, sadness and stress. Shout out to Katie, Josie, Jen, Ellen, Alex and of course Ryan for guiding us in order to have the meaningful conversations and interactions I longed for. You all have helped me more than you know. Thank you guys for pushing me to find the qualities I want to possess inside, and inspiring me to strive to achieve these goals by emulating them on the outside.

And now, on to another very important subject. Beans.

UPDATE #1: If any of you know me really well, you'd know that while I LOVE food, I can also be a pretty picky eater. Aka I don't eat beans. I haven't since my parents fed them to me at 7 months old in my high chair. My boyfriend can attest, I always order my chipotle bowls as "No beans please." Like I've said though, some stuff has changed. I now eat a lot of beans. Beans yesterday, beans today, beans every day. Sometimes even beans twice a day. Black beans, brown beans, red beans, garbanzo beans, even recently some caper...beans. In all honestly I was never much of a rice fan either unless it was smothered in whatever was in my burrito, but what are beans without rice here in the DR? (they're still beans actually, we have them without rice a lot so..)

UPDATE #2: I swore off meat consumption for the summer while I was living in Amherst (with a few actual, and a few not so actual accidents here and there, I'm only human...) *I KNOW THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO MANY OF YOU as I have always been a meat enthusiast, due to my fathers incredible cooking abilities, but after my dear chicken Henrietta died, I've been doing some reflection.* Anyways despite this, I had not selected vegetarian on my abroad application. I decided I wanted to experience all Dominican cuisine had to offer. Well the truth is Dominican cuisine didn't have that much to offer...except that parasite I mentioned. Kidding aside, I lasted about a little less than a month trying to get myself to eat and/or avoided the meat in my dishes until I finally gained the courage to tell my host mom I no longer could eat it. So once I again I am a pescatarian and luckily, Josephina makes delicious fish.

UPDATE #3: I am now officially Dominicana. A common form of transportation here in the DR is by moto concho aka a motorcycle dirt bike hybrid. They are most common by the beach, you pay about a dollar to fit 2-4 people on a moto and the driver takes you anywhere within a few miles. Although, what they forget to tell you is that on the right side of the bike there is a HUGE AF HOT AF EXHAUST PIPE THAT BURNS THE POOP OUT OF YOUR LEG IF YOU EVEN TOUCH IT FOR A MILLISECOND (please excuse my potty mouth but it really, really hurt). You've probably guessed by now that I burned a pretty good sized portion of my leg. A huge two inch bubble formed and currently has peeled off to expose the underlying scabs and new pretty pink colored skin that I will have for the next few months. If you know me i'm not usually one of good luck or good coordination so its not very surprising I can't catch a break in this country. As my dad always says, "Jeez, Becca its just one thing after another with you, isn't?" Yes Dad, yes it is. The bright side is that many Dominicans have stopped to show me their scars as well! One boy had three so maybe I'm lucky after all?

UPDATE #4: Wild dolphins swam and played with our boat. It was beautiful.

IMPORTANT!!! UPDATE #5: Although many people may think of the Dominican Republic as paradise (and me bragging about dolphins may not help the cause) the reality is this is a developing country. Poverty, lack of education and pollution fill up the portions of the country that are not resorts and beaches. Every day I walk to school without breathing through my nose because the smell of the trash baking in the hot sun fills the streets in the poor barrios. The city of Santiago is filled with loud rundown cars, people begging for money, trash and low income neighborhoods. There are no real parks with green grass or clean areas to sit. Many poor neighborhoods do not have potable drinking water and children live with the same amoebas I got rid of in a few weeks for their entire lives. High school is optional so many kids drop out and the education system is not up to par. As luxury usually is, it's only for the rich. Everyone doesn't live by the beach carefree. Two minutes after seeing the Dolphins we approached another sight floating in the water, but this time it was trash. The homeless prolong their injuries, often re-breaking their legs to gain more sympathy and the crime rate here is on the rise. The reality of the situation in this country should be spoken about as much as the breathtaking beaches posted on social media.

As my 21st birthday approaches I realize I'm filled with more fear than excitement. I'm entering further into my twenties and leaving my childhood behind. Soon enough I will never be innocent, naive and free of real responsibility and accountability again (like Carlucho), so I guess this means it's about time I start acting more like an adult (at least some of the time...) and the rest of the time remember what it means to have the spirit of a child.

I can't believe there is only one month left.


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